Do You Treat Your Spouse as Well as a Stranger? 

*This is directed toward the ladies, but many of the principles I discuss also apply to how husbands treat their wives* 

I have witnessed, and experienced, how some women treat friends, co-workers, and complete strangers better than they treat their own husbands. I suspect most of them have never thought of their behavior in this way. Consequently, I want to shine a needed spotlight on this relationship-destroying flaw and encourage wives to devote themselves more fully, passionately, and submissively to their husbands.  

Shirin Altsohn

First, let’s start with appearance. A first impression is usually formed, at least in part, by our physical appearance, grooming, and clothing. Our outward appearance says a great deal about the things we value, how we see ourselves, and how we view others. 

Ladies, think of your life and ask yourself a simple question: “Do I dress nicer for my friends, co-workers and strangers than I do for my husband at home?” Doubtless, your answer is yes and, doubtless, many women would retort: “Well, yeah, of course I dress up to go out, but I’m not going to dress up at home!” I would respond: “Why not?” 

Think of it, you women spend so much time and effort dolling yourselves up, doing your hair, plucking this or that, and making yourselves fancy for people who are less important in your life – a boss, for instance. Many of you, however, let your hair down, throw on some sweats or shorts, and wash off your makeup when you get home; that is to say, you let yourself go when you are around your husband. 

Alternatively, you might never do yourself up at all during the day if you stay home, thinking it unnecessary. In your mind, dressing up and looking good is only for being outside the home or for “special” occasions, implying the time with your spouse is less valuable and less special. 

Maybe you feel extra comfortable around your husband and feel that lounging with him and never going out of your way to be visually appealing is no problem. If both of you are fine with that, then more power to you (though, truth be told, a lot of guys would prefer to see you looking neat and stylish even around the house, though they would probably never tell you so to your face). However, ask yourself a couple more questions. 

First, ask: “When my husband arrives home from work, does he see me at my best?” If not, then ask: “Doesn’t my husband deserve to see me at my best?” In all honesty, why should you be better-dressed for your boss, your co-worker, your friend from high school you are meeting for lunch, or random people in public than for your husband? 

Don’t misunderstand; you don’t need to wear high heels, a retro rockabilly dress, classy jewelry or a beautiful chocker, styled hair, and neat makeup all day. Then again, I personally think that’s an absolutely adorable and attractive style. This high-class style helps accentuate a woman’s natural femininity. The point, however, is to consider whether you make more of an effort to dress up for the world or for your husband. If the former, then you might need to change what you’re doing. 

When you were dating your now husband, did you let yourself look like a slob around him? Probably not. During courtship, you likely went out of your way to freshen up before you would see him, fix up your hair before a date, or put on something nice to impress him. What about now? Do you still try to impress him? Do still try to look your most gorgeous around him? Do you even make an effort at all to be his bombshell wife that he’s proud to have on his arm? 

Making an effort to look desirable, well-kempt, and attractive will keep alive an element of passion, induce more respect and decent behavior in both you and your spouse, and will make you feel better. Physical appearance is not everything, but it’s a palpable way to show your investment in your relationship, your respect for your spouse, and your enduring desirability. 

More important than appearance is attitude, mindset, and maturity. I refer specifically to femininity. Being feminine is only partially about your physical appearance, dress, and grooming. Rather, it is a mindset and a way of living. It’s the substance of womanhood and the thing that draws men to you like a moth to a flame. It is, in all likelihood, one of the reasons your husband was attracted to you to begin with and is, whether he says it or not, a quality he wants to see you nurture, display, and perfect. 

As I wrote in my piece “A Girl Worth Fighting For,” femininity refers to appearance, certainly, but more to an inward quality unique to women; a quality that attracts men: 

“Why is it that men are drawn to women of this sort; women who embrace their femininity and wear skirts, dresses, and other ladylike apparel? I believe that this style is attractive precisely because skirts and dresses set women apart as women. Men are inherently attracted to women. It’s in our microchip. People of both genders have the innate desire to cleave to one another (Genesis 2:24). It’s a godly impulse. Thus, to sharpen and strengthen that impulse by outward attire is positive and beneficial, whereas blurring those divine lines is destructive and disconcerting. 

“A woman who habitually wears men’s clothing, participates in men’s activities, and acts like “one of the guys,” loses something precious. She diminishes, in a degree, her inherent femininity and a part of that which, by divine design, makes her attractive. Again, this is not to say that women who play basketball, spend time around men, or do something outdoorsy or physical, are bad people, foolish, or corrupt. Yet, women who spend their time competing with men and trying to be like them lose that edge God has given them – their divine femininity.  

“However, the heart of the woman is more important than whether she occasionally wears pants or plays sports. It’s trumps skirts and long hair. The purest form of femininity exudes from within. It bubbles up in the form of charm, wit, allure, vivaciousness, and a type of unique light or energy that men simply can’t duplicate – and often can’t resist. . . . 

“Femininity is a virtue and a strength. It is a gift and a talent. It has a very real power to entice, inspire, uplift, brighten, and persuade. Any woman who has mastered the art of femininity, both in dress and behavior, is a cut above the rest and is worth fighting for as only men can.  

“When you combine virtue, submissiveness, and femininity together in one, you see the image of a real woman emerge. Unlike the counterfeit version offered by feminism, this blend of virtues is true empowerment. It’s the substance of real womanhood. It’s what causes good men to fight, risk their lives, and even die in foreign wastelands. It’s what prompts men to feats of strength and great exertions of character. It’s the thing that persuades men to raise their chin, square their shoulders, and work harder. Ironically, it’s the very thing that makes us become the sort of men women love and desire.” 

Wives, do you behave and act in a feminine way around your husband? Did you when you were dating? I tend to think you probably did, even if you didn’t do it overtly or consciously. If you did act more femininely when you were dating, why not now? Should you put your best foot forward in the rehearsal or in the main event? Also, if you have drastically changed your behavior since tying the knot and have become less feminine or less of what you were before, you have to ask whether you were dabbling in false advertising during courtship or if your loss of femininity happened through carelessness. 

It seems that women generally behave womanlier and more femininely when they are dating, but become more hardened, crass, and sloppy when they get married; as if it was all an act meant to catch a mate instead of who they really were. If you are in the same boat – even if this has happened unconsciously and was never your intention – you can course correct, embrace your natural femininity, and recapture your husband’s heart.  

Becoming more feminine around your husband will produce magical effects. Perhaps not immediate effects, but palpable and lasting ones that will move your relationship in the right direction. It will show that you still care about him, that you respect him enough to look and act nice for him, and that you are still the high-quality woman he thought he was marrying. 

Part of having a feminine attitude is being deferential, dutiful, and humble before your husband. Notice what I did not say. I did not say that being feminine is being a slave, a servant, or a voiceless, mindless, dependent “doormat.” Strong men want strong women, but not the unruly “strong and independent” type Hollywood and the Marxist-feminist movement promote. The strength we desire, honor, and crave is the confidence you show in your own femininity, your willingness to be submissive and trusting, and the respect and loyalty you show to us as men, husbands, and heads of households. 

Being submissive to your husband shows far more strength of character and will power than being rebellious, back talking your man, or doing everything yourself. Any petulant, selfish, egotistical woman can behave like that and live her own “independent” life her way without regard to another person. It takes a stronger woman, a humbler woman, a more confident woman, to willingly submit to, respect, and live well for a man. That voluntary submission and willingness to work on yourself, go out of your way to tidy yourself up, and to express loyalty, love, and attentiveness in a hundred little ways, is what is so endearing. 

Let me now draw more contrasting comparisons to work or public life and home or marriage. For you working women, do you defer to your boss, doctor, or priest? If not, you would probably be fired. Then why not also defer to your husband? Who is more important to you? Who besides God stands in a position of more importance in your life? 

If you are a stay-at-home wife, which is awesome and preferable, do you listen to and receive counsel from your husband? If not, why not? What is stopping you? What is holding you back from truly trusting him and becoming his first officer? 

Ladies, if your boss asked or told you to do something, would you back talk? Would you toy with him? Would you give him the run around? Would you give him some lip or sass and question his authority? Would you rebuff him? Would you ignore him? Of course not! Yet, the same woman who wouldn’t dare ignore or disobey her boss often has zero problem challenging, rebuking, or back talking to her husband. In all seriousness, ladies, isn’t this backwards and wrong? Why does your husband occupy a lower level on your totem of respect? 

If your husband asks something of you, do you do it or do you shrug your shoulders and consider it to be optional? What about if your boss asks you to do something? Try shrugging your shoulders and ignoring him the next time he makes a request and see what happens. If you don’t expect your boss to tolerate insubordination and unruly behavior, why should your husband have to tolerate and endure it at home? If anything, you should be more willing to work harder, more promptly, and more enthusiastically when your husband makes a request than when your boss does. 

Think more deeply about the language you use. Would you use the same insulting, sarcastic, dismissive language you use with your spouse with your boss or your friend or your dentist? Do you yell, get short with, or roll your eyes at, your store clerk, your co-worker, or your doctor? If not, then consider whether it is better to show respect to a boss, friend, lawyer, doctor, etc., or to a spouse. 

Women have a unique ability to calm down, placate, and soothe angry, exhausted, or brooding men. Yet, there’s little in this life more grating and repugnant than a quarrelsome woman who raises her voice, yells, and demeans with her words. It’s not right when a man does it, but it is positively unnatural and noxious when a woman does. Ladies, if you wouldn’t dream of going around in public ranting, screaming shrilly, or dismissively treating those you meet, why would you ever do any of these things to the man you say you love – the one you have voluntarily chosen to be with for the rest of your life? 

Part of the reason why we don’t treat each other as civilly as we should is the fact that modern life is so constructed as to prevent spouses from spending the maximum amount of time together. When life gets busy, husbands and wives only spend a few short waking hours together. Even on a normal day, the bulk of your time is spent at an office, factory, or away from home, spouse, and family. Is this conducive to growing positive relationships? Of course not! 

People in general also lack emotional intelligence (normal intelligence, too). We are living in a state of arrested development. An argument can me made that men suffer from this malady more since women are jumping ahead in getting degrees, earning higher grades, and other factors I deem irrelevant. However, in my own life experience and observations at universities and in society, it’s the ladies who lack emotional intelligence. 

Without any doubt, women are weepier than men. Women often lack the same fortitude as men and quit difficult things more readily. This perhaps shines a light on why over 80% of divorces are initiated by women. When the going gets tough, they get going; they don’t have the character to see it through or the willingness to do those things that would help their relationship most. 

Recently, I read a great statement from one Jon Sole on The Tradwives Club Facebook page that said: “A marriage without a head is chaos and a marriage with two heads is a monster.” This is not only true, but profoundly so. 

From the beginning, women have played a crucial support role in the home. While the man is the head of the home, the woman is the heart. Both need each other to function, but each has a different function. A heart trying to do the brain’s job is a failure because it wasn’t designed to be a brain. Instead, it was designed to be a heart and can do that job better than a brain ever could. 

The same is true in marriage. This is why it is so critically important to understand the proper roles of men and women and to acknowledge, accept, and embrace God’s marriage dynamic as illustrated in the scriptures. If women understood their proper place in the home, they would not rebel against it as much, find as much cause for complaint, be as unhappy, or be susceptive to feminist propaganda that tries to paint them as victims of oppression. And if men understood their role, they would likewise be better leaders, more attentive, and more effective. 

The Christian writer Charlotte Maxfield explained a solution to marital conflicts. She addressed herself to wives who feel the need to be “independent” and who don’t want to, or can’t bring themselves to, truly trust their husbands and follow the Lord’s Plan for marriage: 

“The solution I suggest to you for overcoming your problems in marriage and bringing peace to your family is exactly what Paul commanded: Submit to your husband in everything! [Ephesians 5:22-24]  

“It’s crazy, you say? It can be done, and I’ve seen it accomplished many times. The changes and blessings it brings are so great that I can hardly express the difference. I have seen several hundred women accomplish it in their lives and as they relate the results of their change in behavior and the reaction within their whole family, their happiness brings tears of joy to your eyes.  

“Can you dare to do it? Have you the courage and faith? What have we really got to lose that is of eternal importance? . . . . 

“Don’t allow yourself to have hurt feelings. It is a sign that you are not truly dedicated yet, and are indulging yourself in childish self pity and it is a form of rebellion against him. If you have displeased him, just honestly tell him that you are sorry and that you’ll correct it. When you really mean it, he’ll know by your actions and respect and worship you for it. . . .  

“Your single and most compelling desire is to obey and please him 100%. As you do this you’ll never have to worry about yourself again: your needs, wants, or welfare.  

“The women who have succeeded in this attitude have found that their husband has become even more confident and manly, more fully accepting of his authority and the responsibility for the welfare of everyone’s needs. Soon, before she even realizes that she has a need, he has provided for it. . . .  

“I know that there are some women who might read these things and the idea of complete submission sends chills of agonizing fear into their hearts, but I have heard fear referred to as lack of faith. In order to succeed in this challenge you must believe that your husband is good. It is frightening to place yourself at the mercy of someone else, but you will find that it will become the most glorious dedication of your existence. The two of you shall reach such realms of exalted joy in your lives together that you will finally begin to know what “home – a heaven on earth” really means. . . .  

“Let me talk to the woman who might tend to feel that she wouldn’t dare to obey everything her husband tells her, because he isn’t perfect and therefore doesn’t have the right. This kind of woman is usually manipulative. Though she’s deathly afraid to admit it to herself, others can see it. She may be the kind of woman who has been unconsciously looking down on her husband in self-righteousness, and treating him like a child who is not permitted to grow into complete manhood. Such a woman will often laugh at such an approach to her future happiness and try to find some logical reason why she couldn’t possibly do it. This justifies her failure to commit herself. It is easier to condemn something as foolish, impractical, faulty, and ridiculous than it is to say, “I haven’t the humility or faith to do it,” or “I’m scared.” Remember, “Thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.” (Gen. 3:16) Some women would like to erase that from the scriptures, but I don’t think that our Father in Heaven could have made it more clear.  

“The only reason a woman will look for an excuse to rationalize or justify her behavior is because she is defending her inside self who is frightened of the truth and afraid of having to humbly dare to change.  

“You must have faith. It is difficult to believe that any man who is entrusted with the welfare and safety of a loving woman who has completely sacrificed all her selfish desires and wishes and pledged her undying obedience unto him would ask such a submissive and delicate possession to commit sin. If he did, I feel that the sin would be upon his head, if she were obeying God’s law. And I cannot believe that any of our husbands are that corrupted.  

“You must have faith in him and in yourself, and in God – that He will bless your sincere efforts. I believe that He will answer you beyond your most vivid imaginings. Ask, knock – for His greatest desire is to have heavenly marriages. Remember that you and the Lord are an “invincible team.”  

“After all, isn’t that what the Lord is asking of you? He has commanded us to place nothing before Him in importance. . . .  

“Well, are you willing to set aside your pride? Are you willing to obey God’s law? Can you willingly obey the head of your home as a similitude of your love for your Savior as Eve did? You know what your husband can become, but only if you will cease to resist and fight him. Your pride may be the only thing which is stifling his spiritual growth into what he can become. 

“Is there any price too great to pay for this promise? If we are to become worthy of this tremendous reward, we must practice and grow now. We must take those few frightening babysteps with faith and courage and humbly pray to the Lord to guide us. I have faith that He will.  

“Great blessings are in store for you if you can now give life to the words and beliefs you have merely been giving lip service to all these years” (Charlotte S. Maxfield, “A Husband – To Have and To Hold,” in Duane S. Crowther and Jean D. Crowther, ed., The Joy of Being a Woman: Guidance for Meaningful Living By Outstanding LDS Women, 198-202). 

After reading this, how do you evaluate yourself? Do you rationalize and justify slighting your husband, disrespecting him, or disobeying him, or do you faithfully, joyfully, proudly jump into your role as his wife? Do you fight against your husband instead of fighting together side by side with him? Do you nitpick at your husband’s flaws as a way to deflect from your own? Do you give your husband the benefit of the doubt or use his imperfections as an excuse to undermine, accuse, or disobey him? Are you stunting your spiritual growth and womanly potential because you refuse to adopt a feminine, submissive, humble heart? 

Mrs. Maxfield is correct when she says that men respond to the way women treat them. Let’s face it, if a woman does not value her husband, he won’t care as much about his own appearance and actions. He should care for himself regardless and can’t blame anyone else for his behavior, but that’s an ideal, not reality. The reality is that the way a woman chooses to respect or disrespect her husband has a powerful influence over him. 

Maxfield is right when she says that a man will live up to the high standards you have for him. If you accept him at a low level, what’s his motivation to improve? Give a man a lofty goal and a clear quest and he will move Heaven and earth to accomplish it. If you have a low opinion of your husband, and, worse, if you make it clear to him that you have a low opinion of him, then he won’t achieve the greatness that he’s capable of. Again, the way a woman responds to a man’s leadership will often decide the course of that leadership in the future. 

The author is also right that a real man will not abuse your trust. That doesn’t mean he won’t make mistakes or fail in life at times or in decision making, but it means that he will sincerely appreciate, cherish, and honor your submission, your loyalty, and your devotion. It makes us rise to the challenge when we know a woman is relying on us, counting on us, and looking to us for leadership, strength, and composure. Most husbands are not tyrannical and won’t turn a wife’s submission – which is a great gift – into a weapon against her. 

Wives, do you truly trust your husband or are you holding back? The answer to this question is a great indicator of the strength of your relationship. If you can’t trust your spouse and fully give yourself to him, you can’t truly be “one flesh” (Genesis 2:24) or have a completely harmonious relationship. If you can’t be submissive to him, show him sincere respect, and work to be a feminine lady, what can you truly offer? The most unique thing you can give is your heart, but you can’t really give it while disrespecting him, treating him worse than a stranger on the street, giving him less deference than you would a boss, dismissing him, or acting like an “independent” woman who “don’t need no man.” 

Ladies, please ask yourself if you love your husband enough to treat him better than anyone else in your life. Are you willing to show him more respect, more deference, more submission, more eagerness to listen, more attentiveness, more care, and more selflessness than to any other person? Are you willing to put in the same effort you made when you were dating to look and behave nice for him? Are you willing to bite your tongue, retain a humble attitude, and nurture a meek mindset with your husband? Finally, are you willing to be the feminine woman he really wants you to be? 

However you act, and whatever you choose to do and be in your marriage, I hope you put your husband first before strangers, co-workers, friends, or anyone else. I hope that the way you treat your spouse is better, kinder, more patient, more compassionate, and more devoted than how you treat anyone else in your life. If not, then why are you even married? 

To close I want to make a confession: I don’t do all of the things I suggested perfectly. Does that surprise you? I doubt it! People often accuse me of being condescending or hypocritical. It’s not condescending to speak assertively and it’s not hypocritical to live imperfectly while sincerely trying to follow your principles. Only one Man has ever lived His principles perfectly and no woman has ever done it. All of us fall short. 

As a husband, I have fallen short of nearly everything above that applies to both men and women. In terms of appearance, for instance, I most often wear shorts here in Panama where I currently reside. I would prefer to wear nicer clothing, but humidity does terrible things to my body. I melt with no clothes on let alone with layers of formal clothing! That said, back in the States I had gradually adopted a little nicer, neater style and, when I finally get back to America with my family, I plan to be even more disciplined in this aspect. 

Committing to live better and more strictly does not mean we will succeed in every situation or that we should be condemned as hypocrites when we fail. All of us, men and women, husbands and wives, must devote ourselves to higher ideals. We will never become better by holding lower standards that don’t ask much of us. What I have outlined above for wives is a hard road, but it’s also a holier road that leads to more rewards for them and for their husbands. It leads to true fulfillment and satisfaction, passion and sincerity, love and commitment, happiness and joy. 

Wives, treat your husbands with the respect owed them, the submissiveness that will make you both more devoted partners and lovers, the femininity that will endear yourself to him and give you more confidence, and with at least the same level of attentiveness and excited love you showed during courtship, and watch as your relationship improves and flourishes. Or, alternatively, continue treating him worse and with less respect than you treat total strangers and watch as your marriage withers and dies. It’s your choice. 

Zack Strong, 
June 15, 2022

Eternal Marriage

*Dedicated to Annette, Simon, Lori, and Katie. May the Holy Spirit open your minds to the truth of this glorious principle of our Savior‘s Gospel* 

Eternal marriage and the exaltation of families is the central idea in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. The Bible supports the doctrine of eternal marriage. Yet, Christendom at large has rejected the notion that marriage lasts beyond the grave. This small article is designed as a refutation of the narrow view of temporary marriage and stands as a witness for the Biblical truth of eternal covenant marriage. 

Let’s start at the beginning. While in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve were married and joined together by God Himself. Genesis 2:18 and 24 tell us: 

“And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. . . .  

“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”  

There you have it – it’s not good that men and women should be alone. Do you think this only applies to mortality? Of course not! Becoming “one flesh” with another through marriage is a higher and holier path than the lonely road of singleness. We are not meant to be single, but to cleave to another eternally in the marriage relationship. In fact, we cannot achieve the most sublime rewards God has in store for the faithful in a single state. Exaltation is a family matter. 

What’s so interesting about Adam and Eve’s marriage is that when it was performed, they were immortal beings. And the One who performed and ordained it was also immortal and possessed the power of eternity. 

If God married Adam and Eve while they were immortal, how long, then, do we think He intended their marriage to last? The answer is plain – forever. Likewise, the Lord is not in the habit of performing temporal works. Ecclesiastes 3:14 says clearly: “I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it.” What in this statement gives us the idea that God conceives of marriage as “until death do you part”? Logic defies such an interpretation. 

In ancient times, the patriarchs were promised eternal posterity and a never-ending family relationship. Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob were specifically promised numberless posterity. Their stories in the book of Genesis, in fact, revolve around the sacred covenant of marriage and staying true to that covenant. Ancient Israel was commanded to not marry outside of this eternal marriage covenant (Deuteronomy 7:3-4). Modern Israel – true Christian believers – are under similar command. 

Also worthy of note is that it was through families – that is, through the patriarchal order established in the beginning with Adam – that the Gospel was administered and the Priesthood functioned. Thus, proper marriage within the covenant was an acknowledged necessity for ancient Christian believers. The next time you read the Old Testament, keep your eyes open for references to covenant marriage. 

Besides man-made creeds, the only real objections that Bible-believing Christians have to the idea of eternal covenant marriage are statements found in Matthew 22:29-30 and 1 Corinthians 7

In the first instance, the Savior Jesus Christ was being tempted by the conniving Sadducees. They attempted to ensnare Him and conjure up something to use against Him. They created a hypothetical situation of a woman who married seven men. Which of these, they asked, would she be married to in the resurrection? The Lord’s response has been almost universally misinterpreted by Christendom to mean that there is no marriage after death. Here are the Lord’s words. Read them carefully: 

“Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God. 

“For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.” 

Where in this statement did Jesus say that marriage is limited to earth life only? Nowhere. He never said there are no married couples in Heaven. He never said marriage doesn’t exist beyond the grave. These are interpolations of uninspired individuals who don’t read very carefully. Rather, the Lord merely said that marriages are not performed in the resurrection. And that’s true. God is a God of order. And in His Gospel Plan, men must perform their ordinances here in mortality, not in the afterlife (1 Peter 4:1-61 Corinthians 15:29John 9:4). But those ordinances, when performed by His holy authority, reach into eternity. This applies as equally to marriage as to any other ordinance such as baptism. 

We thus see that the Redeemer’s statement about not marrying in the resurrection is true and that it does nothing to refute eternal marriage. In fact, the idea of marriage was tangential in this exchange. The focus was on the resurrection, which the Lord confirmed as a verity. And, as we will see later, the Lord very pointedly confirmed what He as Jehovah had taught to Adam and Eve about the everlasting nature of marriage. 

The only other passage that some cling to in their desperate attempt to dismiss the idea of eternal marriage is the Apostle Paul’s statement that it’s good to remain as himself, which some interpret to mean being single. In the first place, Paul’s writings deal primarily with marriage in this life and don’t address marriage in the afterlife except in passing. Second, the entire idea that Paul is a witness against marriage in general, or eternal marriage specifically, can be easily countered by simply reading the context of the statement in 1 Corinthians 7 or by exploring Paul’s other writings. 

For instance, in the very same chapter in question, Paul praised marriage and said “let them marry.” He imparted various counsel to husbands and wives to love and support each other. He affirmed in verse ten that men and women were created to be together, saying: “And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband.” Men and women separating from each other was never part of the Gospel Plan. Rather, they were to be together forever. 

 To the Ephesians, Paul similarly wrote: 

“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. . . . 

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh” (Ephesians 5:28, 31). 

The importance of men and women becoming “one flesh” was touched upon several times in Paul’s epistles. For instance, in 1 Corinthians 11:11, Paul explained that “neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.” To divide men and women and promote singleness is contrary to the order of God. And the order of God comprehends eternity, not merely this short mortal probation. In the Lord, that is, in eternity, we are meant to be together, as one flesh, in the holy marriage union. After all, it was Paul who taught that “marriage is honourable” (Hebrews 13:4). 

Finally, this great apostle warned his fellow Christians that the day would come when men had strayed so far from the truth that they would actually forbid marriage: 

“Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils; 

“Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron; 

“Forbidding to marry. . .” (1 Timothy 4:1-3). 

Clearly, to Paul, marriage was a crucial institution and a fundamental part of the eternal Gospel of Jesus Christ. He clearly taught that those who reject marriage or lessen its important are have “departed from the faith” and are repeating “doctrines of devils.” The idea of monastic singleness, therefore, was an abomination in Paul’s eyes. To the contrary, it is in the marriage covenant that we find true joy and communion with God. 

At the beginning, I mentioned that Adam and Eve were married by the Lord and that the Lord, by His very nature, operates on eternal principles. The Lord’s authority is called the Holy Priesthood. He has, at times, delegated this authority to chosen representatives on earth. This gives them the authority to ensure the efficacy of ordinances beyond the grave. The Lord explained it this way: 

“And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven”  (Matthew 16:19). 

The keys of the kingdom of heaven – in other words, the Priesthood – has the power to “bind . . . in heaven” that which is performed here on earth. While baptism and other lesser ordinances are certainly performed by virtue of the Priesthood, the crowning object of this divine authority is to seal men and women together in eternal matrimony and prepare them for exaltation, as family units, in God’s Kingdom. 

“Family unit” is just another way of saying “one flesh.” I remind the reader that the Lord commanded Adam and Eve, and, by extension, all of us, that we were to become “one flesh.” Eternity is not intended to be spent alone or in a single condition. Such an existence is “not good” to the Lord (Genesis 2:18). Rather, eternity it is to be enjoyed as couples bound together by loving ties and God’s matchless power

In the Old Testament, God promised us that He would send Elijah to restore the specific Priesthood keys to bind and seal families together. This is recorded in Malachi 4:5-6

“Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord: 

“And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.” 

This great power is designed specifically to unite “children” and “fathers,” or families, eternally. And the basis of every family is a marriage between a man and his wife. This is so paramount to the Lord that He has vowed to “smite the earth with a curse” if we reject this Plan of uniting families together. I testify that Elijah has returned and that the authority to bind families together for eternity exists on the earth and in His Church, just as the Lord promised. 

Dear reader, God is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). His Gospel and commandments don’t change. Neither do His power and authority. If He joined Adam and Eve together in eternal marriage, told them that it was “not good” to be alone, and instructed them to be “one flesh,” the counsel similarly applies to you and to me. If He was able to do this for Adam and Eve, He is able to do it for us. If Elijah possessed special Priesthood keys to seal families for eternity, and if the Lord promised he would be sent to earth to restore that practice before the Second Coming, then we ought to be on the lookout today for the organization that possesses this great power and which places families front and center in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Significantly, the Master Himself taught the plain doctrine of eternal marriage. You’ll notice that it is a repetition of the same doctrine given to Adam and Eve, recorded by Moses in Genesis, and preached later by the apostles. The Gospel is unchanging and these instructions should ring in our ears with force and fervor: 

“Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 

“And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 

“Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 

“[The Pharisees] say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 

“He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so” (Matthew 19:4-8). 

No, marriage was never intended to end – neither in this life or in the life to come. This false idea – this doctrine of devils – has been accepted by Christendom and reinforced by non-Biblical creeds, but “from the beginning it was not so.” Rather, in the beginning, God commanded us to leave our parents and “cleave” to our spouses. We were told to become “one flesh” with them – not for some finite period of time, but, logically, for forever. After all, it was God who joined them (and who joins us when it is by His authority), and it was never part of the Plan for them to be “put asunder.” This is simple doctrine and it comports with every feeling of common sense and logic that I possess. 

Beyond human reason, however, I give my personal witness of the Spirit that marriage is eternal and that the sacred scriptures – yes, even the Holy Bible – confirm this fact. Anyone can receive a sure witness of these things if they humbly appeal to the Father in prayer and then allow the Holy Spirit to touch their hearts and enlighten their understandings. 

For Christians who believe that their marriage union is ordained of God and who love their spouses with a true love, there can be nothing sweeter than the promise that they may bind themselves eternally to their loved ones, and that they may live together in the Kingdom of God their Father. This potential exists. It is real. The spirit of Elijah is working hard to convince people to unite their families, past and present. The keys of the Kingdom that Jesus Christ gave anciently to His Apostles are on the earth once more, allowing men and women to truly become “one flesh” for all eternity. And the word of the Lord echoes down through time that we are designed to be together in eternal families and never-ending joy. 

Zack Strong, 
January 15, 2022

A Personal Sketch

In my years of public involvement in our nation’s political discourse, I have published hundreds of pages of material, including three books, over one hundred online articles, and about a decade’s worth of social media updates equaling hundreds of thousands of words of commentary on my public pages and groups. I’ve been very outspoken as I’ve shared my views on a wide range of topics. Recently, however, I realized that I have never taken the time to properly introduce myself as a person to my audience. Out of respect to those people who have faithfully supported me all these years, I take this opportunity to share a personal sketch of my life that I hope will not be too tedious and unexciting.

My full name is Zackary Adam Strong. I was born to wonderful parents on July 17, 1987 in Boise, Idaho. I was the first of five children to enter my parents’ humble home. I and my parents, three sisters, and brother moved a lot as my Dad, a phenomenal history teacher and first-rate coach, took new job opportunities as they arose in a myriad of states. In fact, in my thirty-two years of life on this planet, I have lived in thirty-five different houses located in seven U.S. states (including Alaska and Hawaii) and three countries (the United States, Russia, and Panama).

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My Dad holding little 6 lb. 13 oz. me in a baseball mitt

Many people would no doubt hate moving as frequently as I have. To be sure, packing, unpacking, and hauling your belongings around is not a fun activity. And answering the questions “Where are you from?” or “Where is your home town?” has also been challenging. The longest I have ever lived consecutively in one location is five years. About twelve of my years I’ve given to the great state of Idaho. If anywhere can be considered my home, it is Idaho.

Despite the sometimes topsy-turvy nature of relocating, I’m grateful for the experience of seeing so many varying parts of our beautiful country and world. I cannot imagine living an entire life in one house, one town, or even one state. There is so much more of God’s beautiful earth to experience.

The most wonderful and inspired move my family made occurred when I turned 14. We moved from Twin Falls, Idaho to Port Lions, Alaska. For a number of months, my parents had considered jobs in Alaska. On one occasion, my Dad was offered a job in a village near the Bering Sea. We held a family council and took a vote. Unanimously, we voted no. Later, when a job became available in Port Lions, we held another family council and the vote unanimously favored moving. It just felt right.

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Alaska is, hands down, my favorite place I’ve lived and part of my heart will always beat for the Last Frontier. I grew to love the peace and quiet of our little Native fishing village more than I can express. As I recently said in my article “Our Majestic World,” you cannot purchase peace and quiet. You cannot find this peace in the cities. Our modern world does not offer it. Only when you leave behind the concrete jungles and approach nature and rural settings can you truly find peace and quiet and the beauty of nature.

Living in Alaska changed my life. In hindsight, I do not know if I would have survived high school in a big school with its toxic environment, herd mentality, and moral laxity. Thankfully, the Lord had different plans for me and my family. I like to tell people that I was the valedictorian of my 2005 graduating class – my graduating class of five people. Our little school in Port Lions had 42 students K-12. I enjoyed the 19-person high school. And I loved having my Dad as my history teacher. Without prejudice, I can honestly say that he was the best teacher I ever had. What sets him apart from most other teachers is that he cares about students on a personal level and gets to know them as individuals. He takes a sincere interest in their life and loves helping people and giving service. Port Lions, Alaska was certainly the right place to get to know people on an intimate level.

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My family is very close-knit. We’ve always loved each other, but our relationships were solidified and fortified in Alaska in ways that would have likely been impossible elsewhere. Because of the smallness of our little village (we had five miles of unpaved road, no stores, no theaters, no banks, no hospitals, and no way in or out except by boat or plane), we spent a lot of time together. When my brother was old enough to attend school, my Mom began working as a school aide. From that time on, we all saw each other in the morning, at school, and at home in the evening.

As close as we became during the week, Sunday was our biggest bonding day. We are all active members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. However, we were the only members of the Church in our 200-person village. With permission from the leadership of our nearest congregation, we held Church meetings in our home for three hours every Sunday. We even had youth programs and devotionals. In my Church, small congregations are called branches. Yet, we were not even a branch; we were a twig! It was a unique learning experience that solidified our closeness as a family unit. I thank my Heavenly Father for the opportunity of living in Alaska!

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During my public school years, I played seven different sports. My favorite was basketball. In Alaska, I also had the opportunity to play mixed-six volleyball; that is, coed volleyball. I was one of our team captains. We were very successful each year, even winning the state championship in my junior year. I also managed to make it to the state cross-country meet in my senior year. Though getting sick and nearly collapsing during the muddy race, I finished about midway in the pack (helpful hint: Don’t eat an entire bag of beef jerky right before running, even if it is your favorite food on the planet).

I relished the Alaskan outdoors. The mountains, forests, and ocean were truly beyond belief. I never took it for granted, even if the frequent rain and months of snow at times grew tiresome. I loved seeing the bald eagles swoop through the air, the Kodiak Brown Bears lumber through the woods (even if they once stole my basket of berries), the sea otters, jellyfish, and killer whales swim in the ocean, the Northern Lights shimmer in the night sky, or the tide rise and recede underneath the wooden causeway spanning a small bay near the town. Picturesque is too weak a term.

The Sitka Blacktail Deer so prevalent on Kodiak Island also taught me how to hunt. Contrary to what many city dwellers think, hunters have a deep respect for animal life. More so, I believe, than environmentalists who repeat nice slogans but don’t know the first thing about nature – or about where their food comes from. Days spent alone with my Dad hiking and hunting in the mountains of Alaska and Idaho supply me with many fond memories and learning experiences. And I’m also not a bad shot with a rifle. Communists beware. You’ll only take my guns after I give you my bullets one at a time.

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After graduating high school in May of ‘05, I attended my first year of college at the University of Alaska – Anchorage. Nothing eventful happened there, but I did write a lot of songs and became much better on the guitar I had begun learning to play in high school. Since that time, I’ve written and demoed a host of songs. I hope one day to polish them off and release them, though my wife seems to think my voice would be considered a weapon of mass destruction to people’s ears.

As I said, nothing eventful happened in my first year of college. However, I did have one experience that foreshadowed one of the most incredible adventures of my life. Late one night, while contemplating which classes to register for during my second semester, I had an overwhelming spiritual impression to take the Russian language. Though I was familiar with Russian history – particularly the bloody history of communism – and was surrounded by Russian influences on Kodiak Island (the first location settled by Russian explorers in Alaska), it had never occurred to me to learn the language. Yet, in that moment of time, I was absolutely sure I needed to take Russian. So I did. Seven months later, I held a paper in my hand from my Church calling me to serve a two-year proselytizing mission to Moscow, Russia. Coincidence? No. Providence? Yes.

My 2006-2008 mission to Russia was a time of growth, challenge, trial, exploration, and learning. I cannot say that I was a very successful missionary (though a handful of people I helped locate or teach eventually joined The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints), but I worked hard and I grew in numerous ways. Two years serving a mission for the Lord teaches you more than four years in any university. I not only learned to speak Russian proficiently, but I learned much about a very unique nation and culture and was also able to visit the Ukraine and Lithuania.

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The knowledge I gained about Russia did not come from books and I did not spend my time living in international enclaves or visiting tourist centers. Rather, I spent every day on the streets and in people’s homes talking with average folks and learning about their families and beliefs. I also spent time in a jail and looking down the barrel of machine guns on more than one occasion because communist religious oppression is still alive in Putin’s Russia. Yet, all of these experiences, and others too personal to share here, confirmed my lifelong belief in the Lord Jesus Christ. I know without one shadow of doubt that God lives, that He hears and answers prayers (often in very immediate and palpable ways), and that He loves us.

After my mission, I briefly returned to Alaska before venturing down to Utah to work. While there, I applied to several universities and was accepted to Brigham Young University – Hawaii in 2010. Just before heading to Laie, Hawaii, I visited my parents in Alaska again. While there, I feverishly wrote a novel I had started writing the year previous. After three months of tireless effort and sleepless nights, I typed “The End,” did a terrible cartwheel upon exiting my room, and ate my Mom’s delicious homemade doughnut holes to celebrate. Sadly, nine years later, I have yet to publish this novel because I’m still tweaking and editing its contents. Tymorius, my main character, deserves to have his story told properly no matter how long it takes.

In 2010, I began studying at BYU-Hawaii. Almost immediately, I met and started dating a beautiful young lady. In 2011, we were married. I thoroughly enjoyed most of our time together. Tragically, the relationship ended in 2014 and we were divorced the following year, leaving my life in something of a shambles. Out of respect, I will not say anything more about her or our time together. Yet, throughout those years I grew a lot and had some interesting experiences.

During that time, for instance, I moved back to Utah and became formally involved with the Independent American Party – a political third party founded in the 1990s. I had joined the IAP via their website around the year 2002, but did not begin actively talking with other members until about 2009 or 2010. Sometime later, I was made a member of the IAP’s National Executive Committee and was appointed the party’s Issues Committee Coordinator. I spearheaded the writing of our “Freedom Declaration” and began routinely publishing articles through the IAP’s website. From approximately 2012-2015, I published 54 articles for the IAP on a host of topics. A few of them are still available, though most were lost when the party changed web hosts a couple years back.

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Visit independentamericanparty.org for more about the IAP

In 2014, the Independent American Party asked me to run for the U.S. House of Representatives out of Utah’s 3rd district. I accepted the offer. Unfortunately, at the height of the campaign, my marriage dissolved and I became depressed, quit my job, and moved to Idaho. Perhaps it did not affect the election outcome too drastically considering that the state of Utah, in violation of state law, barred all third party and independent candidates from participating in the debates that year. I have the official letter to prove it.

However, I did have the honor of speaking at a “meet the candidates” event in Heber City. Though it will sound highly immodest, I stole the show. I enjoy public speaking and consider myself a worthy teacher. That night, my comments received the loudest applause and the biggest crowd reactions. I spoke of the police state we live in, quoted from my pocket Constitution, appealed to the wisdom of the Founding Fathers, advocated for religion and morality in public policy, and diverged from the other candidates on nearly every issue. During the event, a Republican candidate sitting next to me began deferring to my answers. At one point, he leaned over and whispered, “I’m voting for you!” That November, I came in third in the election, with 3,192 people supporting me – and all this without a fair opportunity to attend the debates and with no funds to run a normal advertisement campaign.

Back in Idaho, I again lived with my parents and my brother who was then in high school. I had graduated and moved away to college when my brother was about six-years-old, so being back home – despite the awful circumstances – was a fantastic opportunity to become acquainted and become true brothers-in-arms. I also started working at my Dad’s school in various capacities. Over the past five years, I have worked as a substitute teacher, assistant coach, dishwasher and cafeteria worker, janitor, test proctor, chaperone, classroom aide, and bus aide. I even helped create a couple haunted houses for the school’s Halloween Harvest Carnival.

Though I have made it my work to speak out against occultism, Satanism, Wicca, paganism, and all forms of spiritual darkness, I confess that I love Halloween! I even run a Facebook page called “Samhain and Yule – Facts and Fun.” Sometimes people who follow my work are shocked when they learn about this hobby of mine. A few have even unfriended, blocked, or cussed me out on Facebook. After all, isn’t Halloween a pagan holiday? In the future, I intend to publish a book that I’m slowly compiling on the true origins and development of Samhain, or Halloween. Until then, we will just have to agree that if you can celebrate the pagan holidays of Christmas (Yule) and Easter, I can celebrate the pagan holiday Halloween.

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The Halloween mask I created and sewed together in 2016

Holidays are big in my family. Some of my best memories revolve around Christmas, Halloween, Independence Day, Easter, and Thanksgiving. I enjoy nothing more than carefree fun spent with my family – and holidays hand us that opportunity on a silver platter. Whether it is waking up at 5 A.M. to spy our presents under the Christmas tree, carving Jack-O-Lanterns, shooting off fireworks, hunting for clues to a hidden prize left by the Easter Bunny, or gorging on turkey, mashed potatoes, and stuffed mushrooms, holiday traditions are part and parcel of my life.

Storytelling and reading are also essential features of my life. Like my hero, Thomas Jefferson, “I cannot live without books.” I was weened as a child on my Dad’s intricate stories. On car trips, at nights, or whenever, my Dad invented characters and fun tales for me and my siblings to enjoy. I also read books on numerous topics ranging from the Titanic to World War II to the War for Independence to dinosaurs. I strongly loved checking out books about astronomy or dinosaurs on the bookmobile that serviced our neighborhood in Green River, Wyoming.

Later, as a teenager, I became enchanted with J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series. I have since read the books in Russian as well as numerous times in English. While some wrongly believe the story is little more than an occult initiation, I love the series’ central message – that good will always triumph over evil, that love is more powerful than hatred, and that qualities like sincerity and friendship are to be valued more than position and wealth.

I trace my love of writing directly to my love of Harry Potter. I consider Harry Potter the greatest book series ever produced and Albus Dumbledore is my favorite literary character (I’m also a certified Slytherin on Pottermore, if anyone is curious. And my patronus is a magpie). It was that magical tale which so thoroughly inspired me that characters, storylines, and worlds of my own creation began inhabiting my thoughts. These characters have become my friends and confidants. When the time is right, I will share some of them, and their unique adventures, with you.

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The most important thing I learned to read in my parents’ home, however, was the Holy Scriptures. Each night, my Dad called our family together and we read a chapter from The Book of Mormon, the Bible, or another book of scripture and ended the day with a prayer. Each week we also had a Family Home Evening where we gathered, sang hymns or songs, read scriptures, had a spiritual lesson, played games, ate sugary treats, and enjoyed the time together. These habits of daily prayer, scripture study, and Christian worship so carefully cultivated by my Mom and Dad have likely shaped my life more than any others. It is these very habits that I plan to pass on to my future children.

The Gospel of Jesus Christ is the guiding light of my life. I love the Lord and the teachings of the holy prophets, both past and present. I have attempted to share my testimony of the truth as a missionary, on social media, in my writings, and with my friends. I encourage people to come to Christ, to learn of Him, and to have faith in His redemptive power. I also encourage all who have not done so to investigate The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Read The Book of Mormon, which is another witness for Christ that supports the Bible’s declaration of His divinity. Pray to the Father and ask Him, in the name of the Lord, whether The Book of Mormon is from Him. I testify that it is and that it confirms that Jesus is the Christ. Have the courage to follow the promptings you receive from the Holy Spirit and come to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and add even more knowledge about the Savior to that knowledge which you already have. I promise that it will bless your life and strengthen your understanding of life, your dedication to goodness, and your family.

Among other things, the Gospel of Jesus Christ has informed my political views more than any other source. Part of my religious creed is that the U.S. Constitution was inspired by God. He worked through the Founding Fathers, who were wise and honorable men, to create that document and establish America as the first free nation in modern times. His hand was directly and powerfully involved in the founding of this Republic. His eternal law was the source from which our Founding Fathers drew their inspiration. His principles are enshrined in the supreme law of our land. America is His base of operations in these last days before His return.

Some of the men that God used to establish this nation were my descendants. Among others, I am distantly related to Caleb Strong. Caleb Strong was an associate of John Adams, served in important positions during the Revolution, was a member of the Constitutional Convention, was elected as one of Massachusetts’ first senators, and served as the governor of that great state for 12 years. All throughout my family history are individuals of piety and purpose who left their mark on this and other nations. I seek to honor them by doing my best to carry forward their heritage of patriotism and devotion to God.

The doctrine of my Church also forewarns of a global Satanic conspiracy that “seeketh to overthrow the freedom of all lands, nations, and countries” (Ether 8:25). We are commanded by the Lord to “awake to a sense of [our] awful situation, because of this secret combination which shall be among [us]” (Ether 8:24). Modern prophets have identified this “secret combination,” or conspiracy, as the communist conspiracy with its goal of world revolution. Those same prophet-leaders have identified this conspiracy as the “greatest satanical threat” to the Church and to mankind. It was not mere coincidence that I chose to write my first two books, A Century of Red and Red Gadiantons, on the communist conspiracy. I did so because I have sworn to fight this archenemy of humanity wherever it raises its ugly head.

The communist conspiracy is feverishly working to subvert our society. You can see it everywhere you look. Communism has never been more powerful and prevalent than it is today. The main reason people do not grasp this fact, however, is that the cabal rarely uses the name “communist.” Instead, it works through front movements like feminism, environmentalism, LGBT, “Islamic” terrorism, democracy and democratic movements, and progressivism. The communists have our culture pinned in a corner and are closing in for the kill. In order to defeat their cultural assaults, we must reenthrone our Faith, Families, and Freedom. We must adopt the Christian constitutionalism of our forefathers. And we must repent, turn to Christ, and become an upright and moral People.

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Perhaps I will close on a more optimistic note. About three years ago, I began dating again. In 2017, I met a happy, faithful, and gorgeous girl named Emma. After two years of interesting courtship, we were married in Panama City, Panama on April 12, 2019. I’m thrilled to be married once more and I’m excited for the day when I will be a father. After God, family means everything to me. My three loyalties are to my Faith, my Family, and my Freedom. I have given much of my short life to teaching the principles of Liberty and to countering and exposing their enemies. I am committed to spending the rest of my life in God’s service, in my family’s service, and in the service of my blessed country.

I am so grateful to have been born in the greatest nation on God’s earth, in one of the best states in that nation, and in a truly wonderful family with parents who taught me the true Gospel of my Savior Jesus Christ. I love the Lord, I love my family and my wife, and I love the Freedom I enjoy in such abundance here in the United States. I trust that for years to come I will be able to fight the battles that need to be fought and help provide you with sufficient information and inspiration along the way so that you can assist in this colossal struggle. May we stand shoulder to shoulder through the dark days ahead and faithfully do our duty until the Lord returns to formally end the war that He has already won. We’re on the victorious side, ladies and gentlemen. We merely need to hold on until the buzzer sounds. That is the sure testimony and personal witness I leave with you. The ultimate victory is ours.

Zack Strong,

July 16, 2019.